Peace in Our Homes

“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your might. Keep these words that I am commanding you today in your heart. Recite them to your children and talk about them when you are at home and when you are away, when you lie down and when you rise. Bind them as a sign on your hand, fix them as an emblem on your forehead, and write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”    Deuteronomy 6:5-9

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What does peace mean to you? Is it nothing more than a lack of violence? Or perhaps it’s a quiet, serene atmosphere? I took a survey to see what people in the keys think and here are some of the results:

A clearer state of mind; ability to function without worries (anxiety)”

“Inner peace means being okay and still in Christ even when things are crazy on the outside. Knowing where I belong in Christ and that it is all for His glory, even if I hate the situation, or love it. That God is enough.”

“Understanding and Comprehending”

“Peace of mind to me means knowing that I can hand my burdens to God constantly and He will help me through it.”

In Judaism there is something called “Shalom Bayit”. This literally means peace in the home. It’s about getting along with one another. But even more, it’s about healthy ways of resolving problems and conflicts. It’s about working together, believing the best in one another, learning to truly hear and understand what is important to the other.

Shalom Bayit relates, very closely, with what Christians mean when we say the marriage vow, “for better or worse”. Unfortunately, both of these very healthy concepts have been perverted by so many to keep victims in abusive marriages. Neither Shalom Bayit nor “for better or worse” provide ANY justification for abuse of any kind for any period of time in any family unit. Rather, they both call especially the adults in the family unit to work together as a team in covenant with one another AND God YHWH. We are to admonish one another IN LOVE, and that love is agape. It is not the fuzzy warm philios or passion of eros. Agape is love in action that can only exist in covenant with the One Who Loved Us Into Being, God, YHWH, Creator, Sustainer, Redeemer.

We are also charged with teaching the ways of agape to our children. We teach them when we guide them in healthy ways of settling differences. In Matthew we learn: “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.” Our demonstration of God’s ways in our own living is the best teacher yet. We know we are living in this peace when our home life generates Hope and Life.

Sometimes we must leave our homes for safety. God, YHWH, never  intends any of us to live in abuse in any of its forms: physical, sexual, emotional, economic, spiritual, emotional. One of the most powerful statements I’ve heard any pastor say is, “For better or worse does not mean until your spouse kills you.” So often victims think that they are breaking their vow if they leave the one abusing them. Absolutely not true, the one abusing you broke the vow when they first abused you. There is no longer a vow for you to keep. There are people who will help you. Your local abuse shelter, Living Springs Counseling are two of the safe places to contact. The 24 Hour Domestic Violence Hotline: 305-⁠743-⁠4440 in Monroe County, FL. Or you can call the Florida State Domestic Violence Hotline: 800-96-ABUSE.

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May your home life generate Hope and Life. May we all continue to grow in our ability to navigate disagreements and other challenging conversations with those we love. May we continue to deepen our ability to live into God’s love both in receiving and giving. May the peace of God.

May the God of endurance and encouragement grant you to live in such harmony with one another that together you may with one voice glorify the Creator of all, Source of all being, God, YHWH, Sustainer, Redeemer, the One Who Loved Us Into Being. 

John tells us that Jesus the Christ said: “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.”

Peace my friends, my family, my brothers and sisters in Christ, my colleagues, my neighbors. Peace.

Love – Pam

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